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Being a jewess, people often seem surprised to see I have a festive winter tree in my living room.  “I thought you were a Jew.  Why do you have a christmas tree at your latke party?”

Man, c’mon.  I’m an American. I celebrate NDGGH. Why can’t the festival of lights involve strings of lights?  On a tree?  No jeebus on it or anything, obviously.  There is a donut, though, and a bowl of spaghetti, even a Nike swoosh.  USA! USA! NDGGH!

Furthermore, it is a well-established urban legend that the Tree in Question has pagan roots.  The only reason (The ONLY reason) it skipped my People is because of our mediterranean climate.  Good luck finding a noble fir anywhere in the holy land.  Oy! Such a schlep I gotta make for this NDGGH tree!  Bettah we just stay home and eat, nu?

I’m glad you, me, and the Christmas tree industry can agree on this.  Now, let’s never, ever talk about my Gingerbread Shul.

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